Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
