Say something about gay babies.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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