How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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