my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
