I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Randomize
