I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
