so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You are the jesus of drinking
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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