i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
