Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
