talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
