i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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