I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
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