dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
They have beer where we have blood.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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