I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
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Whatever it is you're doing, you're doing it wrong.
You better beat his ass with a pan or something. I'd kill someone if they did that.
He just grabbed it to learn your name and now he's using it to buy the breakfast you promised him...and porn.
I bet this girl is easy… super easy
He is "The most interesting man in the world"!!!!
I'm loving all the references to other texts on this site. Well played Internet trolls. Oh, and porkswords definatly the funniest guy on here.
Clearly you didn't deliver on the sex, and hes getting some breakfast...