Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Swine flu. Run for my life!
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
My liver just broke up with me...
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
