It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes