if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Send us your Text From Last Night!
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.