my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Woman Using Lunch Break To Find Another Job Gets Hilariously Snitched On By The Local News
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
28 ‘Thanks For Coming To My Ted Talk Tweets’ Funnier And More Informative Than An Actual Ted Talk
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.