also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
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laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
she told me i tasted like america
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
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I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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