New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
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totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.