he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
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Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
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double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
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This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.