is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."