My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Send us your Text From Last Night!
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.