All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Send us your Text From Last Night!
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation