They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.