That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.