omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
