Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'