Texts From Last Night

Texts from June, 2012

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  (616): View more from Michigan

  When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."

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  (616): When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED." http://tfl.nu/uf90
  Replies (8) Good night (1336) Bad night (702)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  sex in a tree stand. check.

  (765): View more from Indiana

  you lucky bastard

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  (317): sex in a tree stand. check. (765): you lucky bastard http://tfl.nu/avsw
  Replies (8) Good night (1794) Bad night (605)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though

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  (601): Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though http://tfl.nu/7jbg
  Replies (25) Good night (953) Bad night (2474) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.

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  (440): Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car. http://tfl.nu/ebaa
  Replies (6) Good night (2089) Bad night (601) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.

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  (415): Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood. http://tfl.nu/lu5t
  Replies (6) Good night (594) Bad night (1509) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation

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  (406): I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation http://tfl.nu/qkc0
  Replies (6) Good night (1132) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.

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  (401): I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands. http://tfl.nu/2kp5
  Replies (20) Good night (700) Bad night (2559) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.

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  (217): I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well. http://tfl.nu/junb
  Replies (5) Good night (839) Bad night (613) Order T-Shirt
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.

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  (605): but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair. http://tfl.nu/hd3s
  Replies (4) Good night (1178) Bad night (535) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.

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  (714): She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING. http://tfl.nu/p2v7
  Replies (13) Good night (2980) Bad night (561) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.

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  (714): She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View. http://tfl.nu/be63
  Replies (12) Good night (738) Bad night (2357) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.

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  (519): All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am. http://tfl.nu/roar
  Replies (13) Good night (1791) Bad night (876) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote

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  (406): I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote http://tfl.nu/6a7z
  Replies (5) Good night (1416) Bad night (522) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go

  (319): View more from Iowa

  IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS

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  (906): cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go (319): IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS http://tfl.nu/nt8z
  Replies (10) Good night (824) Bad night (1638)
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  (310): View more from California

  I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.

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  (310): I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE. http://tfl.nu/riqc
  Replies (3) Good night (781) Bad night (1255) Order T-Shirt