I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
