I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
You must be Logged in to post a comment
the worst is when you have superwood laying on your stomach while you sleep. it makes your dick feel like it's about to pop.
if i received this tet from my bf i think my heart would melt. sad?
11:23...nothing needs to br re-read. Facts are simple, europe is pretty much taken over by hitler in a matter of weeks... Britian almost, If it weren't for us. I'm sure your life is shitty in Europe cause it's a shit hole over there... But thank America everyday of your shitty life it isn't shittier..( cause it would have been)
I think we are too busy enjoying a good morning fuck to care
I'm born and raised in the US, and pretty much everything posted thus far in regards to WWII and the Revolutionary War only furthers the point that we a bunch of blithering uneducated morons. Happy Independence Day!
Yea most Europeans are pompous jerks.... but the british accent is hot as hell... but Brittain is still mad about the Revolutionary war where we got everything and they were left with thier hands out asking for more taxes
I loooooove this text! Probably because my boy is from MN and I was in Wisconsin for a trip a few months ago :)
I don't give a rat's ass about Eurotrash or Ameriwhores, but I love me some morning wood!!!
I'm married, so it's not slutty. ;)
12:35 the euros don't owe us, but to we'd be living under nazi america w/out russia is a bit much
they're just jealous that americans know how to have fun. don't worry about them.
People aren't directly forced to stay, 10 PM, not like in Nazi territories. The facts that EOE is an easily faked term and lawyers like to get paid for their services make it harder than it should be. But some people just give up on trying or think the world owes them a living. And I used to be homeless, so I do know what I'm saying.
How did this discussion happen?
Everyone sucks. There are nasty people everywhere. I will call you a liar if you said you didn't know anyone who got freaky every once and a while, no matter what country they're from.
this is the deepest discussion stemming from morning wood I have ever seen!
What started out as a simple "Man, I've got a raging boner this morning" turned into WWIII. I always figured this would happen....
Is it wrong that the first thing I thought when I read this was "awww"? hahah
Sounds like some of us americans need to do a little research on WWII. If it weren't for soviet support the allies would have lost the war. The euros don't have us to thank nor do we have them to thank. Without the russians we'd be living in nazi america right now. So try and get your shit straight before arguing false idiotic points. It makes us look bad....or I should say, worse.
damn...this conversation is a buzz kill.
12:45-I don't think she was lonely and all that shit. She just hates the U.S. and something set her off. It is pretty stupid how many girls stated they thought the text was so sute and romantic. I kind of understand, we're a bit of a joke as a society. I think when the german dude jumped in that's when the shit hit the fan. Ah well, people like to argue.
5.59 maybe you're right but it goes both ways. "Your whole continent smells of piss" - do you think the person who posted that is basing this on actual knowledge?! (For the record I have been in 14 states on 5 visits to the states - enough to form an opinion)
shut up you fucking douchebags
4:19 so you are Russian then? ( :
I live in Holland and we most of us dont like Americans, and i'm not just saying that. Maybe some of us just dont care but most ppl here dont like you.
all i have to say is that i'm American and i love it and i don't give 2 shits whether these prude people like me or not.
6:45, do you think it could reach me here in texas? sounds yummy ;)
7:22 - sucks if you don't have someone to take care of it for you... I never let that go to waste ;)
um doesn't europe have a reputation for being much more open sexually that america?
Why is there a big fight over Europeans vs. Americans? People from one country or one continent are still individuals.
i think this text is sweet, and maybe you europeans could get a life instead of sitting on this website :]
can't we all just get along?
EOE is a crock though. It's too easy to get around.
yeah and european people don't shower. and british people have disgusting teeth. aren't stereotypes fun?!
"why can't we be friends, whyyy can't we be friendsss"
My occassional morning uberwoods are kinda scary. I'm 6'3" and the entire head sits well above my navel when I'm laying down.
It's funny that all these Europeans say they hate America... Cause if it wasn't for us stupid Americana, all u fucks would be living under hitlers regime. Next time your pussy as countrys ( that pull out of Iraq like a bunch of pussies u know who u are uk) get attacked, cause u will cause your a bunch of cunts, you'll be begging for america to rescue u.
without the russians we would have lost. likewise applies though, if the russians didnt have us they'd be fucked. however, every other country in between was busy changing out their tampons while hitler was kicking ass. the issue today is the European countries hate all the privileges we have. jealous bastards
the U.K. sounds kinda boring
hahaha yeah ofcourse the US troops saved our lives, and UK did almost nothing, and the Russians??? they just gave up, 'cuz they knew Americans can take care of everything because they are the best nation in the world. I live in Germany and i am lucky to be a millioner so please choke with your dirty humburger and dont teach me about good life, Auf wiedersehen fat ass.
Dude. When did this turn into a flame war??? Let's all just appreciate the beauty of morning wood and those who partake in enjoying it, ummmmkay???
I agree whole-heartedly. These people don't even realize that the declaration of independence was signed on 8/2/1776 and the Constitution signed on 9/17/1787.
July 4th my ass.
You all need to get over yourselves. This is about a hard on. Not some fight about what country is better. The world is going down the shitter. get over it.
Yes, it is a continent. I meant to say "speak for your entire nation," but the message should still be clear enough.
Getting a sexy text from your boyfriend and liking it doesn't make you a slut....in USA or Europe. You guys are no fun!
11:36 ofcourse they didnt tell you they dont like americans - 'cuz you're american. you were just too american to understand that.
I think everyone is missing the point here......
lol 2:28, you should personally thank 2:40 for further proving your point.
oh no! a bunch of nazis think we're stupid & slutty
Did we learn nothing from Michael Jackson??? It doesnt matter if you're black or white. Lets all have a group hug and embrace the morning wood......
C'mon people. We americans are arrogant pricks who are mostly fat slutty slobs. And that's how we like it apperantly. So fuck 'em.
at least we have nice teeth
and that does sound like quite spectacular... if only it could've reached
9:25-- oh please!!!! give me a break. you should take a lesson from 9:49. our concept of a "ghetto" is a far cry from what you seem to be referring to.
Ummm, Europe = continent, not country.
11:51 oh i get it, so when its anonymous you tell us you hate us but you wont say it to our faces, i wish i could be more like that
9:49 i live in nyc and you dont know what you talking about. Thats easy 4 u to say that nobody stops ppl from getting out of the ghetto. But the truth is that exept from phisical force EVERYTHING stops them to leave the ghetto.
9:29 you are not good enogh for us to hate you, we just dont like you. And most of those texts dont even talk about drunk nights or whatever, they just show how dumb you are and thats funny.
Thank you american soldiers for helping us Germans. bahahahaha... Americans were pussys in 2WW, you just make a good films about it but the truth is that without drunk crazy Russians from the east we would win.
6:37, I would also love this text from my bf! :) I think it's hot.
The only problem I ever have with it is trying to piss after I get out of bed. If it won't go away, I either have to just jerk it first, stand in the shower or, if I'm feeling really bold, brace myself on the wall and counter and lean forward to line up the shot.
Im american and i love europe, when i was in europe last summer no one told me they hated americans they just said they hated Bush...
ahahahaha I love this.
im canadian and i <3 americans!
I'm from the UK and I love getting texts like that from the guys I'm dating!
me toooo 7:01! morning wood is the best!
I hope the recipient escapes Wisconsin soon and gets back to being loved up in the a.m.!! Before texting, I got phone calls like that and it definitely kept me focused on getting out of there!
Your spectacular hardon makes me touch myself. Like right now
fuck off or gordon brown will be the one hiding in a cave
texts like these make me hope the terrorists win
AMERICA FUCKING RULES
that is all
8:49 #2 --- what makes you think we give two shits about what anyone in holland thinks? you say that like it's vital to our survival. ohhhhhhhh no! what will i do now?
Family*, and thanks I will
all this because a lonely, horny, depressed chick from the UK took her frustration out on some americans.
How can any of these self-righteous lowlifes really know what it's like to "be American", when they've never lived here. I don't pretend to know what it's like to be British....although, I've heard a lot about your grills over there.... :-S
Yes 6:37, sad indeed.
yeah, 10:38, which is why i don't know why they're being a bunch of prudes and calling us slutty instead of just laughing at it.
i'm proud to be an American.....
10:51 i think you have to re-read the history of 2WW. I am sure you saw a lot of very good films about the courage of americans but try to see the real picture and not the one they show your fat ass dumb slutty american mind in Steven Spielberg films. And go with your friends to Mcdonalds to talk about it.
I CUM RED, WHITE, AND BLUE.... I should probably see a doctor about that
I'm from Germany and i agree with the UK girl. Maybe we just dont get you but for us Americans are gross people. Girls=sluts. Guys=stupid.
5.00, 5.27; agreed. We are not all prudes with no sense of humour, thank you VERY much.
Umm, Europe = cuntinent, tool, and weird
Did you know that supersized morning wood growth spurts have a whole day's worth of self esteem? Remember to thank your penis and give it a hand in the morning.
yet you visit our websites to read about how much fun we had last night. if you hate us so much, then why do you care?
wow.. what about the french? they're ALL about being naked.
ugh all the euros on here need to settle down. guarantee half of them saying shit about us have never even been here.
we didn't start the fire. it was always burning, since the world's been turning.
7:57, that is absolutely disgusting.
Right, because no European woman enjoys waking up to find her boyfriend has a raging erection. Way to lump the myriad voices of your country to fit your own delusions of national grandeur, you wanker.
See, that sort of thing is why so many Americans think Europeans are pompous pricks. Those of you who try to speak for the entire nation assume that the rest of your countrymen share your sweeping negative generalization of us, which is based on your extremely minimal -- and likely biased -- interaction with us.
quick question. what reason does anyone in europe have to hate americans so much?
All you cunts wishing for this text from your BFs are stupid twits. Like it's cute or romantic, you're all pathetic jokes of women. In the U.K. this could never be construed as that. Fucking americans.
"Ghetto" doesn't mean what it did in Nazi Germany, at least not in America. The government isn't forcing people into or to stay in them. Some people are born into bad conditions, but if they can afford to get out, they're allowed to do so.
Everybody knows that they're fucking idiots right? Fighting for their countries and their historical standings on a post about morning wood. Keep livin' the dream guys.
We didn't start the flame war.
Oh yeah.. And stfu you pos euros.. Who always bails you out of wars.. AMERICAN SOLDIERS?! We should have let you all die in Hitler's ghettos.
Hey now! Let's get back to the meaning of this text.. Will one of you guys please invent a boner that can travel from Afgan/Iraq to the states.. It's really not cool not getting any cuz of war when you're a newly wed...
Americans are dirty, men have no respect for weman, girls are sluts. And you call us nazis? ( : hahaha maybe we WERE nazis but you are the one who have ghettos in 2009.
LET'S GET SOUR ON SOME KRAUTS!!
Idgaf about Europe, your whole continent smells like piss
And thank you, 9 25, for calling me, my mom, and my little cousin of 14 years of age sluts, I feel the love
This is a really inappropriate place for this discussion but to the UK girl who started it all - speak for yourself love. I'm from the UK and I would have found that text really funny. "Romantic" not so much though...
wow. I just typed a long ass thing and there was an error. fuck you tfln
I'M AN AMERICAN AND I DON'T MIND SAYING THAT I LIKE GETTING DIRTY TEXTS! HELL YEAH!
hahahaha i cant belive you guys talk about 2 world war when the text is about a hard american dick
agreed 5:59, i feel like they only know what they see on television, the ridiculous things that go on here, but i assure you that most americans also find those same things to be ridiculous
fuck yeah canada.
i love my country.
Rite! N hoo givs a fuk abowt speling? Hoo our ewe two tell mi hau two spel?! Ewe putt ewes n ease n da midull of erry werd!
^Gigantic Load of Sarcasm^
canada just so happens to rule :)
and we helped win WWI and WWII
9:00 nevermind i dont want to start this here. Lots of love to you from Holland. ( :
Haha, might as well be able to reach that far.
youre a fucking loser 2:28 for taking your time to tell us we're wasting our time. let us waste our time and have fun arguing about which country/continent is better.
HAHAHAHAHA 9:09. gotta love an anonymous cyber-hardass.
10:03 say hi to your slutty famely
I agree with 7:28.... morning sex makes my day
haha i didnt know so much europians visit this dirty american site ( : fuck US, St. Petersburg's the best!
i just found the page "ijustwanttotellyou" good twist on these kinda places
Fuck off weinerschintzel....Your fucking language sounds like a retarded german shepherd.
I'm American, but without Hitler attacking the USSR, allies were fucked. The Red Army through millions of bodies at Germany and that was what won the war.
hahaha, reppin' minnesota with morning wood.
Why can't my bf send me a text like this?
1:36, why do you find it to be so? to each his own, but i'm seriously curious.
hate on America all you want, but don't act like you know us, from my experience the exchange students from Europe were always the sluttiest girls at the school
i would so love my bf even more if i got that text message! altho i dont know if there is room to love him more! :)
It's sexy AND romantic
The declaration of independence may have been signed on August 2nd, but it was in fact declared and printed on July 4th, 1776.
I hate morning sex. It's the least pleasurable time to have sex.
no need to trash us. you could simply say you don't like us. no need for name-calling.
The UK did almost nothing, 11.56? Do you want to tell that to the families of the nearly half a million UK citizens killed in WWII? Yes, America helped the allies win but show some fucking respect.
like stranger in Moscow.... la la la al ..... RIP