I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
