But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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