At least make sure they are 18
Why
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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