sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
