Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Having a random hookup so left but love u
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize