Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
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I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
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Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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