I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
