He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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