He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
