i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
