dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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