He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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