is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
