But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
