It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize