The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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