It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize