Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
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You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
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I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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