My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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