I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
be right there i have to get my cape
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
