Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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