I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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